So there’s only one channel in this motel,
This morning while I was getting ready I was watching Sesame Street.
They were doing this bit where some clown was trying to wash his hands but kept washing his feet or his elbows and Elmo would go, “no mister noodle, your HANDS!” and all the tv kids would laugh.
Around the fourth or fifth time he couldn’t find his hands, I heard a grown man yell from somewhere else in the motel, “GODDAMMIT, MR. NOODLE.”
LITERALLY MY FAVORITE STORY ON ALL OF TUMBLR.
Shit Tina Fey’s Five Year Old Daughter Says
seems very fitting considering who her mother is
HOW DO YOU MAKE A GUY
- Parents: Don't forget to make us proud
- Friends: Don't forget to socialize
- Teachers: Don't forget to get A's
- Strangers: Don't forget to blend in
- Opposite sex: Don't forget to look good
- Society: Don't forget to be perfect
- Tumblr: Fuck the world, at least you haven't murdered somebody today
- Tumblr: But just in case you want to get away with it, here are some tips.
paradiselostbythedashboardlight:
inspired by this
Tony Stark is missing in that scale
Tony Stark is the scale
“GIVE IT SEVEN YEARS AND HE’LL BE GIVING YOU JUST THAT.”
#such a beautiful place to be with a grande non fat soy latte
the longer you look the funnier it is
Dobby doesn’t have to take anybody’s shit anymore. Dobby is a free elf
“You’re worth the whole damn bunch put together.”
